smells of the past

So I cleaned up my room yesterday and found this old perfume that my first boyfriend from high school gave me years and years ago...I can't remember what it's called but the perfume is by Escada. I loved the smell of this perfume and used to wear it almost every day. Today I decided to put it on and wear it to work. And that was a big mistake. The whole day, I just thought of the past...what I used to be like in high school...my ex-boyfriend...everything. That perfume made me nostalgic. And I was so tired of the smell even before I arrived to work. During my shift, I swear, the smell seeped into my mouth and I could taste a bitter taste in my mouth. Does perfume expire? I guess I should chuck that bottle away...I just have a hard time throwing away things. This was the first bottle of perfume that I ever owned!!

Anyway, an interesting conversation that I had today during my lunch break was the stigma of working in retail. Everyone in retail knows it, sales associates are at the bottom of the totem pole and if you want to move up, you have to dedicate your time to being a good employee before you can be promoted as a manager. Interestingly enough, decades ago, a sales associate was actually a reputable job because you really had to know your merchandise and people would specialize in their departments. But with the hustle and bustle rushed paced at the end of the 20th century, many retail jobs became lower end jobs. Think about boutique stores to Forever 21...very different store environments with different types of sales associates. But during this recession, the retail industry is one of the few industries that has been forecasted to grow. I am still embarrassed to be working in retail--but my position at Cwonder is more than just a sales associate--I do a lot of visual merchandising and promoting the brand. Cwonder has really surprised me by the caliber of sales associates that they hire. A lot of us are college graduates, students, or transitioning through careers. Today I got to know two more sales associates. One is apparently a R&B/Pop singer who just signed with Time Warner and is working on her first album! We heard some of her music today and it was pretty good! Another one is an accountant who used to work at Deloitte, Deutsche Bank and now will start her job at Ernst&Young in January! Who would have known, right?

From the client's perception of the sales associate, we may have lowly roles in their lives, just servicing them at stores...but at the end of the day, we are also human too. I think the problem arises when customers do not treat sales associates as people. Clients get mad, act rude, demand outrageous things from us and then they also want a discount on top of that. Don't get me wrong, there are also wonderful customers who are patient and treat me like a decent person...but there are other customers who just want to be waited on hand and foot. It's so interesting how people judge you based off of your job and then they either act like they are better than you or they can treat you as equals. This is a big lesson for me to always remember to treat everyone as equals, so when I become successful, I do not loose ground of where I've come from...from the bottom of the totem poll as a sales associate.

my off-by-a-centimeter day

I have decided to blog again! I am going to be more dedicated to documenting my life post-grad. I think this will be so great to read years from now when I am (hopefully) somewhat successful. I will look back and see all that I have overcome. And you know me, I am all about documenting moments in life since I am a sentimental and nostalgic human being. This blog will also hold me accountable for producing something...and I will be able to write again and think critically. Plus, this will be my outlet to do something somewhat intelligent.

For my inaugural welcome post in my new "twentysomething year old" themed blog, I will have to write about my off day today. You know when you're building something or measuring something, there's nothing worse than being off by one centimeter. It's like you are so close, but that tiny little gap makes all the difference. Well, that was what my day was like. I had an interview with the biggest Latin American television network called RedeGlobo. It is a Brazilian company and I was interviewing for a position in their international office in New York office. This job position hit me like a ton of bricks. I have already secured an internship for the Spring of 2012 and I'm doing pretty well at CWonder. Sage, my first Portuguese tutor who currently works there facebook messaged me about the job and the next day (today), I was already interviewing in Portuguese!!! Of course I was nervous because a) I don't like interviews...when I get really nervous, I just stammer and get really flustered b) I had to conduct the interview in Portuguese!! I haven't really spoken Portuguese in a formal setting since college! I know it hasn't been too long ago, but I have not been practicing very often. And my summer in Brazil was spent talking to little kids--so...yeah, my Portuguese is definitely on the decline. The interview was strange. It all lasted for about 15 minutes and by the end of the interview, I realized I did not want the job. I was going to be an office assistant--making coffee, buying bread for staff, and answering telephones. I feel like I have more impact at CWonder. I also did not get a good vibe from the office and from the management team. It seemed like a position that had no growth potential...but I could always finagle something and try to move up. Anyway, if given the offer, I don't know how likely I would accept this offer... The thing is, I spent a lot of time preparing for this interview and the process was a letdown. Just like being off by 1 centimeter. There wasn't a fit for me and my gut is telling me to not take this job offer. Anyway, here I am again going off on a hypothetical rant for a job that I have not even secured.

Then, I went to the gym and worked out till 4PM because I wanted to go to Veronica's bikhram yoga class at 4:30. This was my second attempt to attend her class and it was a complete and miserable fail. Carlos, another co-worker of mine, was egging me to go with him to do the class for free.  He has been persistently asking me to go with him. So I decided to finally go...I enter the studio with 2 minutes to spare. I walk into this studio and this pungent smell of feet assaults my nose. I speak with the instructor and apparently, they only give out one free guest pass per class. And Carlos was listed for the free guest pass...and I wasn't. So I would have to pay for the class...and I wasn't in the mood to pay for a class that I thought would be free in a stinky room to do hot yoga for 90 minutes. nonooono. I just told the lady that this is not in my budget right now and thanked her for her time. Carlos felt so bad...and to be honest, I was also irritated. I lugged a really heavy gym bag all over the city to do this class with him, just for him and Veronica! I was already slightly moody because of my interview and hectic afternoon of going uptown and downtown and I just started to tear up. After I left the building, the tears just gathered in my eyes and sneaked down my cheeks. That was the frosting on the cake that had to make my day. Who knew such a tiny incident could finally push me over the anxiety edge and cry right there on Fulton St. in the financial district? As I made my way down the street with blurred vision, a kind lady who saw how distraught I was insisted that I walk first through the narrow street. She was so friendly and I won't forget her act of kindness. I dried my tears at the Duane Reade and vowed to never go to this yoga studio. I've just had very bad luck going there and the energy is just weird about this place. Plus it reeks of smelly feet odor! Sorry Veronica, I adore you, but this studio is on my RIDICU-List.

See what I mean by off-by-a-centimeter? So close, but no cigar!

Cheers and here's to a better Saturday!