the twentysomething year old

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New York, NY, United States
What makes life so interesting are the risks you take and the people you meet. I've lived the majority of my life fearing the consequences of risks. Well, that's what the twenties are for! I am going to write about my trials and tribulations of being a twentysomething year old in this big world, trying to figure it all out. It's going to be a topsy turvy ride, but that's what being in your twenties is all about.

Tuesday, September 04, 2012

beginnings and endings.



When I first saw this photo, I thought, "This is so me."

Perhaps before I discuss finishing things, I'd like to have a conversation about beginnings.

Beginnings are my favorite part of the project. I LOVE to start things. That sensation of starting something new, being able to mold it any which way and actually having a say in the foundation of its creation. Writing those first concrete words down. Or learning those first steps in a dance. I think with confidence, "I'm going to do this!" (and then in parenthesis I think I hope I finish.)

Going to a new school. The start of a new semester. The feeling of "I'm not so sure what I'm getting myself into." The beginning of a new relationship with a project, or even with a somebody (who could be) special. Beginnings are the best because the idealized version will always be the best version.

Beginnings are also my favorite part in life because there's all that hope, anticipation to see how things will turn out and where it will lead you.

But just as sure there is a beginning, there is always an end. Endings are good too but they don't have the same thrilling sensation as beginnings have. Endings mean transitions and closings. Maybe that's why I have trouble finishing projects--I have trouble with closure and leaving--so why finish at all? I guess the biggest thing I have to accept is that in order to move on, I must finish one chapter, tie up all the loose ends (if possible) and embrace myself for a new beginning. And that's something I can look forward to. 
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2 comments:

  1. pixiedustSeptember 7, 2012 at 6:20 PM

    I can certainly relate to how you're feeling. I always find it difficult to close one chapter of my life yet it's much easier to begin something new. Perhaps it is with closure but perhaps it can also be a fear of change. Something new also means "unchartered territory". What if the issue is really about a willingness to try something new and to move on?

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  2. mosaicpiecesSeptember 14, 2012 at 12:01 PM

    Very good questions. It's definitely elements of fear of uncharted territory and willingness to move on. Holding onto the past is safe because it already happened. Trying something new, well, you can never predict how it will ever turn out. And perhaps that unpredictability is why I never finish anything.

    I mean, I do finish things--but I enjoy the starting projects so much more. The freshness of doing something new is intoxicating.

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